It’s like this chemical thing. You know? Everytime she starts laughing, I just want to pull my arm off, just so I have something to throw at her.
Do you think every president goes through a awkward first few weeks in office when they’re not sure when’s the right time to ask if aliens are real or not?
it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same
I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life
For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw
What did the cat say to the dog?
cats don’t talk
we don’t just need feminism, we need lisa simpson feminism
The best part about the Simpsons was it was written all by educated men that wanted to be comedians but saw things wrong with the world and wanted change.
“But that wasn´t the first time I ever saw her. I saw her in the hallways at school, and at my mother’s false funeral, and walking the sidewalks in the Abnegation sector. I saw her, but I didn’t see her; no one saw her the way she truly was until she jumped.
I suppose a fire that burns that bright is not meant to last.”
lets have phone sex over walkie talkies
"I’ll make you moan, over"
"bend what? over"